Do you have any habits that you’re currently trying to break?

Of course I have habits I’m trying to break. Doesn’t everyone? However, I don’t want to call it a habit or anything because in order for something to be a habit, you have to be aware that you’re doing it, and work on being self-aware enough to do the work necessary to change it. The thing I’m working on the most I’d consider to be a skill more than a habit, because I have to learn it. I want to be more self-aware of not only my own feeling and emotions, but also the emotions and feelings of those around me. I want to learn how to be supportive and know that, despite maybe having been a poor friend in the past, I aim to make up for all of the times that I have made situations and circumstnces that another individual was going through, and I have selfishly made it about me. I want to do better and be a better person and I want people (mostly my daughter) to look at my efforts to change, be more empathetic, and be a better mother and wife, and I want people to be able to point to me as an example. You know, I want people to be able to look at me and say, “Wow, if she can change and do the work, maybe I can too.” Especially for my daughter, I want her to know that even if something seems impossible or scary or uncomfortable, you should never give up. The rewards outweigh the risk in every sense. I want to be an examle that says, “No matter how many times you fall, always get back up. Failure doesn’t define who you are, much in the same way that winning isn’t an indicator for how successful (or unsuccessful) you are. It’s HOW you win, HOW you fail, and HOW you come back from being knocked down.” Those are the kinds of things I believe to be the qualities that define who you are as a person and contributes to how strong your sense of self is. I want to learn to listen to understand, I want to stop being defensive and I want to be able to be confident enough in myself and my abilities that when I do inevitably make a mistake, I don’t let it define me. I want to acknowledge my mistake in the moment, apologize for said mistake, an correct it, BEFORE I even have the though of becoming defensive. I just want to show my daughter that we are all humans and we all make mistakes, but we are all capeable of making positive changes, correcting bad habits we have been taught, and most importantly, that we ALL possess the necessary tools and abilities to change. We can be better, more understanding, and much more open to hearing and learning about the lived experiences of others.

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