Beliefs

I’m going to list three of my core beliefs and why they matter to me. Perhaps someone will relate to them or agree with me on some points.

Everyone should have the right to bodily autonomy.

Everyone deserves the right to govern their own bodies and make decisions for themselves. Everyone. Whether you identify as male, female, asexual, LGBTQ+ ect, it does not matter. The abortion issue frequently comes up when this is being discussed and while I have been rather hesitant only sharing a few of my viewpoints, I aim to address those in full, as I am in no way fearful of potential reprecussions.

I’m well-versed on the subject of abortion, I’m in the middle of writing a book on adoption and the issues within the system and unfortunately adoption goes hand-in-hand with abortion and affects nearly every sector of Child Protective Services and all of the programs that are designed to aid women and children. For starters, let’s stop assuming (well men need to stop assuming really) that women are irresponsible and should be held accountable for “spreading their legs,” when in reality most women who receive an abortion never thought in a million years that they would find themselves having to make such a heartbreaking decision.

Second, I’ll add some facts on how birth control was conceived (no pun intended). Birth control was formed by the Catholic church originally, and was designed to give women their periods and prevent the influx of children into the system that was occurring at the time. However, in order to keep he integrity of the church it had to be “natural,” so it was engineered to give women mencies every month, not only to assure that they couldn’t get pregnant while on the pill, but also to alert women that they were not pregnant. This leads me into why some women forgo the option to even take birth control.

When an egg is released, it punctures and leaves a hole in the uterine wall. This cell division has the potential to cause cauncer because that’s what cancer is on the molecular level. Cancer is caused when the cell divides. Women who are on birth control are more likely to develop all sorts of different kinds of cancer depending on the woman’s individual body type. Not to mention that birth control comes with some wicked side effects which is the reason a lot of women rely on the pull-out method or Plan B. Birth control methods like Mirana that requires your doctor to insert it, those are dangerous. They can be stuck into the uterine wall and can cause ectopic pregnancies (where the egg is fertilized and begins to grow outside of the uterus, which can cause hemorrhaging, and that can lead to death if not treated immediately).

New research has surfaced and doctors are claiming that more and more women are having these ectopic pregnancies and that’s very dangerous for those that are in states where abortion access is limited or banned entirely. This is why its extremely important that abortion access be legal and safe. Sexual promiscuity is NOT an excuse for taking away a woman’s right to choose. It shouldn’t matter what city council thinks (as is the case in Mason, Ohio), it shouldn’t matter what Sally in goddamn Nebraska thinks, and then men in these women’s lives should have no say either. That last point seems harsh, but women who are in happy and healthy relationships often confer with their partners anyways. The women who don’t are usually victims of rape or are in environments that they don’t feel comfortable raising children in. For all those conservatives that believe men should have a say when they are in a committed relationships, they already do. It’s rare circumstances that the mans opinion is not taken into consideration.

Comprehensive sexual education in schools.

Another one of my core beliefs, especially since I have a 3-year-old daughter, is fighting for comprehensive sexual education in school. No. I do NOT mean abstinence-based sexual eduation, that’s a load of bullshit. I want young men to be educated on a woman’s anatomy, taught about what constitutes as consent (including how to aquire it), and to be knowledgeable about pregnancy and what it does to women’s bodies along with the effects of menstruation.

Most men I encounter hardly know anything about these subjects. I have heard many a man proclaim that you cannot “rape your wife,” which is an absolutely absurd thing to say and is jarring to hear as a woman. I will tell my husband some of the experiences I have had as a young woman trying to navigate sex, love, and relationships and he looks at me as if I have multiple heads. He is the exception, not the rule. My husband isn’t a pig. It brings me great relief, however it concerns me because he believes that because he would never act like that, most other men will also not behave that way; I know better. I feel as if I am reminding him constantly that our daughter will eventually be a young woman, and if we don’t educate our young men now, I fear my daughter will also have these same awful experiences.

Comprehensive sexual education in schools will alleviate a lot of issues in our current society. If we taught every child equally whether they are young men or women we would all benefit greatly. I’ll use the menonites as an example of this because it’s one of the few societies where it’s an evident and palpable issue. Menonites aren’t taught about sex hardly at all, let alone the consequences of having unprotected sex. When young women decide that they no longer wish to be Menonite, they often find themselves in less than savory situations. Drug use and pregnancies out of wedlock being the most common. The reference I am using for this is a personal account from the television show Breaking Amish. You can argue the legitimacy of this all day but I also have background knowledge as I live in Ohio and my Aunt hires the Amish to do upgrades and maintenence on her farm home in Pennsylvania. Both PA and OH are areas that are largely inhabited by the Amish, hell the spices I use in the food I cook, are from the Amish haha. Abstinence-only programs have been proven time and time again to be ineffective against stopping premature sexual encounters. Second question, who REALLY wants to talk to their own kids about sex?

The power of positive thinking

My final core belief is to stay positive. The saying, “fake it until you make it” has some science behind it. It’s not the end all be all of solutions, no. You still have to put in the work to break the habits of rumination that you’ve conditioned yourself into. However, there are studies that show if you think positiveely enough, you will attract positivity to you. For example, have you ever worried about something happening (regardless of it being good or bad) so much it consumes your every thought, and then (much to your dismay) it happens? That’s the power your perception holds. Look at the things that happen to you as an opportunity to grow and learn and you wll be much better for it, and attract the things you desire in your life.

I’m retisent to comment on The Secret and the law of attraction because people take it far too literally. There is some merit to it, but to claim that it has the potential to change your life overnight is a massive lie. The effects of your positivity may take a long time to manifest themselves in reality, but give it effort and enough time and watch your life change for the better, approach any problem as if it were a new opportunity, a chance to learn, or engagee in something new. That’s the power of positivity.

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